Rambling Journal Entry #180604: Here I sit, pondering to share or not to share, and without a doubt, I am going to share. Tonight was the first night that I grabbed food from a drive-thru since April 5th. The reason that it has been so long, is that every time I went through one in the past 605 Days, I would text Mike to see if he wanted anything.

Tonight, I forced myself to go through Burger Time and order a burger. Mike liked the fried cheese curds from there. However, I would never get a burger, but a chicken sandwich, because the grilled aroma of the burger did not sit well with Mike’s chemo nausea. It was taxing, but, I did make it through without too much emotional anxiety. Uff da. Weirdness.

Oh, the other thing that I have been able to do lately is opening the patio blinds more often than not. I just did not want the brightness, but favored the dimness.

Now embarking on my sole proprietorship of this graphic design business is daunting, as it is adding schedule to my daily existence. I know Mike is glad, but it’s just tough for me as it is loosening the hold of grief. If that makes any sense whatsoever.

Also, that Cadillac is taken care of, so I haven’t any much more connection with his house, as that was one of my last responsibilities there for Mama Bernie.

Each new day, I am becoming a step more alive than I have been. But, that burger sure was tasty delicious.

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